For much of the summer, Yahoo!’s PuckDaddy blog has featured an ongoing series “Five Ways I’d Change the NHL”. Matt Bradley chipped in not long ago, much as he chips in goals throughout a season (shootout and otherwise).
Today, Ross McKeon threw his own ideas into the ring. We at DCO mostly remember Ross for his downright slanderous remarks on Ovie and the Caps during the All-Star Break (along with the typically expected mourning over Sid’s owie ankle ruining the entire league). This time, he takes his shot at the entire Caps organization in his very first “suggestion”. I’ll paste it here so there is no need to waste time reading the rest of his drivel:
1. Less is more: We're talking contraction here, fewer teams means better quality of play and so much more. Ding six franchises to get the league down to 24 teams (12 per conference, six in each of four divisions). Who goes? Atlanta Thrashers, Carolina Hurricanes, Florida Panthers, Tampa Bay Lightning, Washington Capitals and Nashville Predators. Hey, look at that, no more Southeast Division.
Typical cheap-shotting of the the SE division. Typical ignorance. Typical Don-Cherry-Canadian-elitist-like snobbery towards teams not possessing golden boys and/or not located in Montreal or Toronto. Sounding a little like Eric Kay from last fall, too.
The initial reaction here at DCO was, of course, a long-winded, blistering post on McKeon’s optimism-hating, Sidney-loving soul. But maybe, just maybe, he’s being stupid for stupid’s sake, making such outrageous comments as to illicit just such a reaction (he got some, too, in his comments section). It’s a pretty logical assumption, because no hockey analyst who is at all deserving of being a hockey analyst (a PAID one, too!) could possibly suggest contracting as up-and-coming a team as the Capitals. It would be the greatest, most outlandish admission of knee-jerk simplistic one-track thinking since Sidney Crosby won an ESPY for “best player in the NHL”.
So he has to be joking.
UPDATE 8/14: Ted Leonsis pens the well-thought-out response.
Showing posts with label pointless arguments. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pointless arguments. Show all posts
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Friday, May 2, 2008
Best Songaila Suspension Outrage Comment
Everyone knows that the place to get the pulse of the Wizards fanbase, in addition to the lame taunts of trolling Clevelanders, is the oft-bizarre, un-modded comments section of the Washington Post's Wizards Insider blog! While they already pay someone to find the super-sweet comments, we found one particular quip that was so brilliant we thought that more props ought to be distributed.
Instead of posting rightful outrage against the conspiracy-driving Lebron Official-nados ourselves, we thought we would instead let the anonymous commenter speak for us all (in his/her best Buckhantz voice):
These others however, funny:
etc. etc. etc. for like ever.
Other blogs are gathering the responses, including a rather neutered one from DCO bff Jake the Snake from Bullets Forever. C'Mon Jake, if the NBA governing bodies can't express professionalism, why should you. (still love you though)
Instead of posting rightful outrage against the conspiracy-driving Lebron Official-nados ourselves, we thought we would instead let the anonymous commenter speak for us all (in his/her best Buckhantz voice):
"IT'S NOT POSSIBLE!!!"Great job there, guy/girl. RE: Lame Cleveland trolls posting the same lame DeShawn Stevenson statutory rape joke like 12 times in a row, it still isn't funny.
These others however, funny:
"I can't feel my jaw!!!" - DC Man88
"The NBA. Where fixing the playoffs happens." - Ben
"Wanna know the definition of irony?
Cavs fans coming on Wizards site to say we are crybabies.
Calling US crybabies? You need to wake up and smell the crap. Have you seen what your poster boy has been doing all series long?" - Brickjp
etc. etc. etc. for like ever.
Other blogs are gathering the responses, including a rather neutered one from DCO bff Jake the Snake from Bullets Forever. C'Mon Jake, if the NBA governing bodies can't express professionalism, why should you. (still love you though)
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Honoring Ovie and Debunking Myths, All In One Article!
The March 24th issue of Sports Illustrated contains a (prophetic?) feature article on Alex Ovechkin and his now-completed quest for 60 goals. It’s a fine piece of sports journalism, one rife with complimentary superlatives from foe and friend. Perhaps the most remarkable aspect of this article, however, was the complete absence of any reference to Sidney Crosby. Finally, perhaps, Alex has shed nearly three years of his name never being more than a breath away from Sid’s. Even at the All Star Game, Ovechkin’s potential solo-ness was overshadowed by the fresh grief of NHL writers everywhere over Sidney’s tender little ankle.
Brilliant article penner Michael Farber caught the attention of DCO Hall of Fame ballot-casters with his masterful tribute to the quest for 60. This work does indeed make a strong case for his induction, though the DCO HOF ultimately decided to exercise prudent restraint, knowing that the hallowed halls honoring DC names such as Stevenson and Lannan must be carefully guarded. While Farber is on a short list of potential future inductees, we must always be wary of a backslide into robotic Crosby worship, which would clearly be an embarrassment to the DCO HOF (and make for some awkward situations in the Deshawn Stevenson Accurate Player Assessment Wing). For the moment, however, well done Mr. Farber.
We at DCO also appreciate a small, easily overlooked portion late in the article that helps to debunk some Ovechkin myths. First, the silly notion that Ovie’s stats are padded by playing in the Southeast Division. Farber statistically annihilates this nonsense. Second, Alex’s growth as a “playmaker” are acknowledged, in that he “passes smartly and uses his teammates more effectively than he once did.”
This last part especially is important, since it contradicts the top knocks on Alex by Crosby apologists who positively bristle at any perceived threat to their Anointed One’s status of Greatest Hockey Player Forever mantle. These knocks include the notions that Ovechkin is “selfish”, “not a playmaker”, does not possess “good vision” (i.e., the ability to consistently blindly and randomly throw the puck into the crease, occasionally resulting in a good-looking goal) or “not good at defense”.
Last week’s game against the Predators contained concrete examples to debunk such absurd detractions. Selfish? Not a playmaker? See the beautiful, hockey-vision-aided set-up of Nicklas Backstrom in the first period for a 2-0 lead (a similar but more beautiful set-up was seen in the win against the Thrashers). Selfish? Not good at defense? See the heart-stopping, potentially foot-breaking, body-bruising shot blocking, particularly towards the end of the game with the Predators’ net empty and Nashville pushing hard for the tying goal. See also the lack of an attempt to wildly fire the puck towards the empty net. See the calm, time-killing easy chip out of the defensive zone that just happened to result in an empty net goal. Unselfish, team-centric play rewarded. Unselfish, team-centric style of play also confirmed by his +23 this season.
More on “not a playmaker”: this derision likely stems from some sort of misguided mathematical notion that one must have a certain proportion of goals to assists (that is, more assists than goals) to qualify as a truly well-rounded player. So a player like Crosby or non-MVP Evgeni Malkin might more readily qualify as a “playmaker” because they score fewer goals and rack up a few more secondary assists, comfortably “balancing” their stat lines towards the assists column.
Ovechkin makes plenty of plays, too, they just happen to be goal-scoring plays. Lots of them. Ironically, perhaps too many of them for the “playmaking” crowd’s liking. If he were sitting at 45 goals and 46 assists instead of 60 goals and 46 assists, he might more readily be called a well-rounded player, and not a “selfish” one. And what’s that all about, “selfish” being the go-to derisive label for prolific goal-scorers (at least those without the aforementioned cozy goal-to-assist ratio)? Is a league-leading total of ten game winning goals selfish? Those helped the team quite a bit.
It is perhaps ridiculous to sit here and complain about the detractors when Alex is rightly piling up accolades as he churns towards multiple trophies and the Caps churn towards the playoffs, but it’s always good to brush up on counter-arguments to ridiculous statements made by ridiculous people who blindly accept ridiculous proclamations on who is supposed to be the NHL’s best player.
Thus the NHL's non-anointed-from-birth best player leads his team against the Hurricanes tonight; those pesky Hurricanes who just will not give up their division leading perch. They're 11-2 in their past 13 games. Pretty hot, you could say. But we know what happens when the play hot teams, don't we?
Brilliant article penner Michael Farber caught the attention of DCO Hall of Fame ballot-casters with his masterful tribute to the quest for 60. This work does indeed make a strong case for his induction, though the DCO HOF ultimately decided to exercise prudent restraint, knowing that the hallowed halls honoring DC names such as Stevenson and Lannan must be carefully guarded. While Farber is on a short list of potential future inductees, we must always be wary of a backslide into robotic Crosby worship, which would clearly be an embarrassment to the DCO HOF (and make for some awkward situations in the Deshawn Stevenson Accurate Player Assessment Wing). For the moment, however, well done Mr. Farber.
We at DCO also appreciate a small, easily overlooked portion late in the article that helps to debunk some Ovechkin myths. First, the silly notion that Ovie’s stats are padded by playing in the Southeast Division. Farber statistically annihilates this nonsense. Second, Alex’s growth as a “playmaker” are acknowledged, in that he “passes smartly and uses his teammates more effectively than he once did.”
This last part especially is important, since it contradicts the top knocks on Alex by Crosby apologists who positively bristle at any perceived threat to their Anointed One’s status of Greatest Hockey Player Forever mantle. These knocks include the notions that Ovechkin is “selfish”, “not a playmaker”, does not possess “good vision” (i.e., the ability to consistently blindly and randomly throw the puck into the crease, occasionally resulting in a good-looking goal) or “not good at defense”.
Last week’s game against the Predators contained concrete examples to debunk such absurd detractions. Selfish? Not a playmaker? See the beautiful, hockey-vision-aided set-up of Nicklas Backstrom in the first period for a 2-0 lead (a similar but more beautiful set-up was seen in the win against the Thrashers). Selfish? Not good at defense? See the heart-stopping, potentially foot-breaking, body-bruising shot blocking, particularly towards the end of the game with the Predators’ net empty and Nashville pushing hard for the tying goal. See also the lack of an attempt to wildly fire the puck towards the empty net. See the calm, time-killing easy chip out of the defensive zone that just happened to result in an empty net goal. Unselfish, team-centric play rewarded. Unselfish, team-centric style of play also confirmed by his +23 this season.
More on “not a playmaker”: this derision likely stems from some sort of misguided mathematical notion that one must have a certain proportion of goals to assists (that is, more assists than goals) to qualify as a truly well-rounded player. So a player like Crosby or non-MVP Evgeni Malkin might more readily qualify as a “playmaker” because they score fewer goals and rack up a few more secondary assists, comfortably “balancing” their stat lines towards the assists column.
Ovechkin makes plenty of plays, too, they just happen to be goal-scoring plays. Lots of them. Ironically, perhaps too many of them for the “playmaking” crowd’s liking. If he were sitting at 45 goals and 46 assists instead of 60 goals and 46 assists, he might more readily be called a well-rounded player, and not a “selfish” one. And what’s that all about, “selfish” being the go-to derisive label for prolific goal-scorers (at least those without the aforementioned cozy goal-to-assist ratio)? Is a league-leading total of ten game winning goals selfish? Those helped the team quite a bit.
It is perhaps ridiculous to sit here and complain about the detractors when Alex is rightly piling up accolades as he churns towards multiple trophies and the Caps churn towards the playoffs, but it’s always good to brush up on counter-arguments to ridiculous statements made by ridiculous people who blindly accept ridiculous proclamations on who is supposed to be the NHL’s best player.
Thus the NHL's non-anointed-from-birth best player leads his team against the Hurricanes tonight; those pesky Hurricanes who just will not give up their division leading perch. They're 11-2 in their past 13 games. Pretty hot, you could say. But we know what happens when the play hot teams, don't we?
Sunday, March 16, 2008
NBC Courageously Presses On
Hats off to NBC for bravely showing today's Penguins-Flyers game, even with The Only Reason To Watch Hockey Ever, Sidney Crosby, again out nursing his injured ankle. We can only hope that there is enough Evgeni Malkin fawning/swooning available to pick up the slack. Godspeed, NBC.
Saturday, March 8, 2008
Garbage (but hope-inducing garbage)
I wish Comcast would show Bruce Boudreau’s postgame press conference instead of this Duke/Maryland game. It will surely be more exciting, if some of the good coach’s hand/arm motions and lip-read colorful language towards the end of that game are any indication. Seriously, what a crock. Total nonsense.
It was well-established for almost three periods that the Bruins couldn’t score 5-on-5. They certainly couldn’t score 5-on-4, even with a full, uninterrupted five minutes to do it (that call is looking more and more suspect given everything that happened late in the third). But 5-on-3, for two or three minutes at a time? Pretty hard not to score. Making it even less hard is the ability to get away with penalties while they continue to be called on your opponents (hi there, Boyd-Gordon-hooking-and-holding David Krejci).
Sure we can argue all day that Donald Brashear could have kept his cool a little more, perhaps to the level that would have kept him in the box for something less than six minutes, but really four of those minutes were a freak accident, and those other two for roughing could just as easily be chalked up to the drama queen dive by the antagonistic Hnidi). And really, I’m generally not one prone to subscribe to theories involving referee conspiracies. I can’t imagine there’s anyone at NHL headquarters thinking “Hey, you know who would be great in the playoffs, those dynamic 8-and-10-goal-giving-up, no personality Bruins. Make sure they win today.” This one was just a little…inconsistent, and at the worst possible time, giving the Bruins the only possible scenario in which they are capable of scoring anymore.
There, however, is the optimistic lining from all this. Boston’s complete inability to generate anything resembling a worthwhile attack while playing anything less than two men up shows their far inferiority to the Caps, and the tremendous defensive strides the Caps have made. This is also the type of nonsense capable of binding a team together, and getting them good and mad for pummeling the Penguins tomorrow, the Flames mid-week, and those Thrashers and dastardly Bruins again next weekend. It’s a perfect primer for a Redskins-like late season run to the playoffs.
Also, doesn’t it feel good to hate Boston again? I haven’t felt such animosity in my heart towards them since that magical first-round playoff victory ten years ago. Glad Comcast showed us some memorable highlights of that one during the game. Pat Burns. Forgot about that guy. He made Bruce’s in-game outbursts look tame.
What I am upset with the Bruins/refs about is that we really have to root for the Sabres tonight against the Hurricanes. It makes me feel dirty to do so, but we can’t be having a seven point division deficit now. Five is still manageable, especially with two more games against Carolina to make up the ground. If the Caps keep playing like they did up to one of the most bizarre, puzzling, nonsensical, befuddling, mind-numbingly inconsistent, baffling series of penalty calls I’ve ever seen, the Penguins and their sizzling darling superstar can be easily dispatched, and we can count the days until the Bruins come back, ripe to have another ten goals hung on them.
It was well-established for almost three periods that the Bruins couldn’t score 5-on-5. They certainly couldn’t score 5-on-4, even with a full, uninterrupted five minutes to do it (that call is looking more and more suspect given everything that happened late in the third). But 5-on-3, for two or three minutes at a time? Pretty hard not to score. Making it even less hard is the ability to get away with penalties while they continue to be called on your opponents (hi there, Boyd-Gordon-hooking-and-holding David Krejci).
Sure we can argue all day that Donald Brashear could have kept his cool a little more, perhaps to the level that would have kept him in the box for something less than six minutes, but really four of those minutes were a freak accident, and those other two for roughing could just as easily be chalked up to the drama queen dive by the antagonistic Hnidi). And really, I’m generally not one prone to subscribe to theories involving referee conspiracies. I can’t imagine there’s anyone at NHL headquarters thinking “Hey, you know who would be great in the playoffs, those dynamic 8-and-10-goal-giving-up, no personality Bruins. Make sure they win today.” This one was just a little…inconsistent, and at the worst possible time, giving the Bruins the only possible scenario in which they are capable of scoring anymore.
There, however, is the optimistic lining from all this. Boston’s complete inability to generate anything resembling a worthwhile attack while playing anything less than two men up shows their far inferiority to the Caps, and the tremendous defensive strides the Caps have made. This is also the type of nonsense capable of binding a team together, and getting them good and mad for pummeling the Penguins tomorrow, the Flames mid-week, and those Thrashers and dastardly Bruins again next weekend. It’s a perfect primer for a Redskins-like late season run to the playoffs.
Also, doesn’t it feel good to hate Boston again? I haven’t felt such animosity in my heart towards them since that magical first-round playoff victory ten years ago. Glad Comcast showed us some memorable highlights of that one during the game. Pat Burns. Forgot about that guy. He made Bruce’s in-game outbursts look tame.
What I am upset with the Bruins/refs about is that we really have to root for the Sabres tonight against the Hurricanes. It makes me feel dirty to do so, but we can’t be having a seven point division deficit now. Five is still manageable, especially with two more games against Carolina to make up the ground. If the Caps keep playing like they did up to one of the most bizarre, puzzling, nonsensical, befuddling, mind-numbingly inconsistent, baffling series of penalty calls I’ve ever seen, the Penguins and their sizzling darling superstar can be easily dispatched, and we can count the days until the Bruins come back, ripe to have another ten goals hung on them.
Thursday, March 6, 2008
What We're All Up Against
Did you hear that Sidney Crosby is back?
Let’s review some excerpts of the AP account of his return against Tampa Bay.
“Sidney Crosby sizzled in his first game since mid January”
“The Pittsburgh star made a dazzling return in his first game in 6 ½ weeks”
“…it was Crosby’s night.”
“Crosby was as fast, fluid, and creative as ever.”
Wow. Sounds amazing. Too bad I didn’t see the game. It must have been an incredible, point-racking-up, dominating performance! I’d better look at the box score to see how many goals and assists he accumulated as he climbs the points standings. What a return! He really is The Next One! Wait, what’s that in the game summary?
One…secondary…assist. ONE…SECONDARY…ASSIST.
This, obviously, is the most heralded secondary assist of all time. There were nine other secondary assists on nine other game-winning goals Tuesday night, but they all obviously are incredibly insignificant. More insignificant: the goal-scorers themselves, who are practically invisible in their non-Sidney-ness. Such scores and assists certainly lacked the grandeur of:
“Crosby cut through the right circle before sending a backhand pass that deflected off a Lightning player and teammate Pascal Dupuis to Talbot in front of the net.”
Hmmm, a blind pass and a couple of lucky deflections to a wide-open teammate. Sounds like dozens of goals scored in the NHL every season. Clearly none as important as Crosby's, though.
A detailed read reveals more of Sid’s heroics:
“He took Talbot’s excellent cross-ice pass near the edge of the left circle and barely missed an open net after being on the ice for perhaps 20 seconds.” A missed open net! The mind is baffled by the magnificence.
“Crosby missed scoring chance after scoring chance before finally setting up Maxime Talbot for the game’s first goal.” Wow! He failed and failed before stumbling into a couple of deflections for his game(hockey?)-saving “setting up” of Talbot.
“He came off the bench and immediately got loose on a breakaway, kicking the puck to his skate while beating defensemen Paul Ranger and Alexandre Picard. But Smith closed his pads to make the save.” Stopped on a breakaway! Good lord! That never happens! All hail Sid!
Anyone else think that perhaps this “Crosby Triumphantly Returns” piece was written immediately after he was injured a month and a half ago? That maybe Alan Robinson, AP Sports Writer, was going with the angle that, no matter what actually happened, “Sid the Kid” was going to “sizzle” in his return (and what’s with Pittsburgh and lame nicknames? Sid the Kid. Big Ben. Pretty creative)? Write up a few generic superlatives, craft a story around them. That seems to have been the plan. I guess we're just lucky he wasn't a star of the game. That would have fanned the flames of fawning passion amongst NHL writers to dangerous levels.
This is what the Capitals face in addition to the Penguins on Sunday (after dispatching Boston again, of course): salivating Sidney apologists just waiting for the chance to write about him “reclaiming” the Best Player in the NHL mantle from Ovechkin (if they ever gave it to Alex in the first place, having knee-jerkingly, perhaps lazily, merely looked one line down on Pittsburgh’s scoring list for the next best player). All it takes is another dazzling assist or two. Then come the stories with leads such as “With all due respect to Alex Ovechkin…” and “Alex Ovechkin must have enjoyed his moment in the sun with Sidney Crosby out…” Actually those aren’t plausible lines, since they mention Ovechkin ahead of Crosby. That’s just sinful.
Want more? Eric McErlain writes about who the best player in the NHL could be. As he says about early this season, “Nobody dared question the supremacy” of Sid.
Crosby is said to have “gutted it out” in the playoffs last season with a broken foot, providing a convenient excuse for his two pointless games to close out a first round loss. Ovechkin, on the other hand, was described as having “flamed out” for going seven games without a goal. The fact that he kept scoring points to stay in the thick of the scoring race is omitted. Also, there is no mention of his debilitating flu during that time.
Then there is the obligatory mention of Malkin and his sans-Sidney rise. At last, in the final, truly damning paragraph, questions as to the potential continued success of Ovechkin and Malkin are raised. Who’s missing? Right, the golden boy. No question about his supremacy or continued success. McErlain does not dare raise this heresy. Sid does no wrong, because it’s been ordained that way and we must follow.
None of this should overshadow the tremendousness of the Caps’ accomplishment last night, of course. Putting a dent in Buffalo’s playoff plans in Buffalo is always a sweet thing (though clearly it will never be as nice as Game 6, 1998. THAT was a Brian Bellows/Joe Juneau-applied dent). Having the somehow-still-reviled-in-Buffalo Alex Ovechkin have a heavy hand in it is even sweeter. And seriously, why still boo him. The turning-into-a-check-from-behind Danny Briere is gone. He bolted from your town and your team. Boo him. That is, when he returns from his shoulder injury. It’s his spearing shoulder, so he can’t play without it.
The huge, huge win keeps the Hurricanes solidly within reach, with the Caps soon to reap the Atlanta-playing benefit the ‘Canes enjoyed last night. Twice. Those four points, plus the two from the game in hand, plus the two from beating Carolina on April 1 = division title. In short, nothing has changed. The inevitable #3 seed remains inevitable.
This complaint-filled rant breaks no new ground, I know. Who hasn’t bellyached about “everybody loves Sidney” outside of Pittsburgh and pseudo-Pittsburgian enclaves in West Virginia? But it’s important to always be mindful of this insidious undercurrent of Sid-worship, and how it threatens to stain everything and everyone in the NHL. It’s decidedly un-dazzling.
Let’s review some excerpts of the AP account of his return against Tampa Bay.
“Sidney Crosby sizzled in his first game since mid January”
“The Pittsburgh star made a dazzling return in his first game in 6 ½ weeks”
“…it was Crosby’s night.”
“Crosby was as fast, fluid, and creative as ever.”
Wow. Sounds amazing. Too bad I didn’t see the game. It must have been an incredible, point-racking-up, dominating performance! I’d better look at the box score to see how many goals and assists he accumulated as he climbs the points standings. What a return! He really is The Next One! Wait, what’s that in the game summary?
One…secondary…assist. ONE…SECONDARY…ASSIST.
This, obviously, is the most heralded secondary assist of all time. There were nine other secondary assists on nine other game-winning goals Tuesday night, but they all obviously are incredibly insignificant. More insignificant: the goal-scorers themselves, who are practically invisible in their non-Sidney-ness. Such scores and assists certainly lacked the grandeur of:
“Crosby cut through the right circle before sending a backhand pass that deflected off a Lightning player and teammate Pascal Dupuis to Talbot in front of the net.”
Hmmm, a blind pass and a couple of lucky deflections to a wide-open teammate. Sounds like dozens of goals scored in the NHL every season. Clearly none as important as Crosby's, though.
A detailed read reveals more of Sid’s heroics:
“He took Talbot’s excellent cross-ice pass near the edge of the left circle and barely missed an open net after being on the ice for perhaps 20 seconds.” A missed open net! The mind is baffled by the magnificence.
“Crosby missed scoring chance after scoring chance before finally setting up Maxime Talbot for the game’s first goal.” Wow! He failed and failed before stumbling into a couple of deflections for his game(hockey?)-saving “setting up” of Talbot.
“He came off the bench and immediately got loose on a breakaway, kicking the puck to his skate while beating defensemen Paul Ranger and Alexandre Picard. But Smith closed his pads to make the save.” Stopped on a breakaway! Good lord! That never happens! All hail Sid!
Anyone else think that perhaps this “Crosby Triumphantly Returns” piece was written immediately after he was injured a month and a half ago? That maybe Alan Robinson, AP Sports Writer, was going with the angle that, no matter what actually happened, “Sid the Kid” was going to “sizzle” in his return (and what’s with Pittsburgh and lame nicknames? Sid the Kid. Big Ben. Pretty creative)? Write up a few generic superlatives, craft a story around them. That seems to have been the plan. I guess we're just lucky he wasn't a star of the game. That would have fanned the flames of fawning passion amongst NHL writers to dangerous levels.
This is what the Capitals face in addition to the Penguins on Sunday (after dispatching Boston again, of course): salivating Sidney apologists just waiting for the chance to write about him “reclaiming” the Best Player in the NHL mantle from Ovechkin (if they ever gave it to Alex in the first place, having knee-jerkingly, perhaps lazily, merely looked one line down on Pittsburgh’s scoring list for the next best player). All it takes is another dazzling assist or two. Then come the stories with leads such as “With all due respect to Alex Ovechkin…” and “Alex Ovechkin must have enjoyed his moment in the sun with Sidney Crosby out…” Actually those aren’t plausible lines, since they mention Ovechkin ahead of Crosby. That’s just sinful.
Want more? Eric McErlain writes about who the best player in the NHL could be. As he says about early this season, “Nobody dared question the supremacy” of Sid.
Crosby is said to have “gutted it out” in the playoffs last season with a broken foot, providing a convenient excuse for his two pointless games to close out a first round loss. Ovechkin, on the other hand, was described as having “flamed out” for going seven games without a goal. The fact that he kept scoring points to stay in the thick of the scoring race is omitted. Also, there is no mention of his debilitating flu during that time.
Then there is the obligatory mention of Malkin and his sans-Sidney rise. At last, in the final, truly damning paragraph, questions as to the potential continued success of Ovechkin and Malkin are raised. Who’s missing? Right, the golden boy. No question about his supremacy or continued success. McErlain does not dare raise this heresy. Sid does no wrong, because it’s been ordained that way and we must follow.
None of this should overshadow the tremendousness of the Caps’ accomplishment last night, of course. Putting a dent in Buffalo’s playoff plans in Buffalo is always a sweet thing (though clearly it will never be as nice as Game 6, 1998. THAT was a Brian Bellows/Joe Juneau-applied dent). Having the somehow-still-reviled-in-Buffalo Alex Ovechkin have a heavy hand in it is even sweeter. And seriously, why still boo him. The turning-into-a-check-from-behind Danny Briere is gone. He bolted from your town and your team. Boo him. That is, when he returns from his shoulder injury. It’s his spearing shoulder, so he can’t play without it.
The huge, huge win keeps the Hurricanes solidly within reach, with the Caps soon to reap the Atlanta-playing benefit the ‘Canes enjoyed last night. Twice. Those four points, plus the two from the game in hand, plus the two from beating Carolina on April 1 = division title. In short, nothing has changed. The inevitable #3 seed remains inevitable.
This complaint-filled rant breaks no new ground, I know. Who hasn’t bellyached about “everybody loves Sidney” outside of Pittsburgh and pseudo-Pittsburgian enclaves in West Virginia? But it’s important to always be mindful of this insidious undercurrent of Sid-worship, and how it threatens to stain everything and everyone in the NHL. It’s decidedly un-dazzling.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Curses, Hexes, and Other Nonsense
With curse of formerly Capitals-dominating Tim Thomas firmly lifted (twice! during the Boston goalie’s Grover-Cleveland-like non-consecutive failed outings in net last night), it’s time to look to the comparably minor Buffalo “curse”. A “curse” in that apparently the Caps haven’t defeated the Sabres yet this season. No worry. We could sit here and cite all kinds of historical precedence for why we shouldn’t feel bad about this minor drought against Buffalo and their annoying Verizon-Center-filling (defililng?) fans, what with the whole Super Bowl XXVI shellacking and that minor affair in the Eastern Conference Finals in 1998 (with Darren Pang practically choking on his “congratulations” to the Capitals on defeating the Sabres and his precious Dominik Hasek), but that’s pointless. And lest any rabid (and by rabid I mean literally infected with rabies) Buffalo fan try to irk us with memories of a 17-16 Bills victory late last year (complete with blown leads and double time-outs), completing a four-game Redskins’ skid, let’s remember the wise words of Bobtimist Prime spoken the very next day: “I’d rather lose four straight games than four straight Super Bowls.” Well put.
Anyway, it’s a good time for hex breaking, seeing as Alex Ovechkin has apparently broken that dreaded Tony-Romo-ish “girlfriend” hex with his recent offensive outburst. How is it that one superstar (Alex) can so successfully break away from the girlfriend curse while another “superstar” (Tony) can be so befuddled by it as to completely collapse (again) late season and into the playoffs? Simple. Tony Romo is a scientifically proven tool (Exhibit A, the most insufferable backwards hat/smile combination you've ever seen; Exhibit B, the fawning over the same; Exhibit C, Pepsi commercials with...never mind) and Alex Ovechkin is not. Hence, Alex is inevitably immune to such non-existent nonsense.
But enough about tomorrow’s win over the Sabres, how about last night’s win over the Bruins? Much has been written about the Ovechkin trick, the Backstrom feeds, the looming non-issue of Cristobal Huet’s minor, non-season-threatening tight back muscles, and the overall hilarious ineptitude of Boston. What has received no press is the hauntingly prescient comment by the aforementioned Bobtimist Prime to me around 4:45 PM yesterday afternoon. Concluding our discussion of what was clearly an upcoming victory for the Caps, Bob said, “Caps, 6-0”. A wonderful prediction, I casually thought. He repeated it again on my way out the door a half hour later. Two and a half hours past that, I watched in awe as the first period ended Caps 6 Bruins 0. Karmatic prophetic ESP ‘tism (wouldn’t be the first time)? Or something? I think we all know the answer to that.
Other wonderful nuggets from last night: Donald Brashear goading Zdeno Chara into a five-minute rest in the penalty box, freeing Ovechkin from the grasp of the great beast, possibly qualifying as the true turning point of the game. From that point onward, what was possibly a one-or-two goal game turned into nothing more than a two-hour debate on how quickly the Caps could reach double digits in goals. Dave Steckel diving to block a shot with a seven-goal lead. Alex reclaiming, again, the scoring lead, and further staking his claim to the Maurice Richard trophy. Can the Hart be far behind?
Anyway, it’s a good time for hex breaking, seeing as Alex Ovechkin has apparently broken that dreaded Tony-Romo-ish “girlfriend” hex with his recent offensive outburst. How is it that one superstar (Alex) can so successfully break away from the girlfriend curse while another “superstar” (Tony) can be so befuddled by it as to completely collapse (again) late season and into the playoffs? Simple. Tony Romo is a scientifically proven tool (Exhibit A, the most insufferable backwards hat/smile combination you've ever seen; Exhibit B, the fawning over the same; Exhibit C, Pepsi commercials with...never mind) and Alex Ovechkin is not. Hence, Alex is inevitably immune to such non-existent nonsense.
But enough about tomorrow’s win over the Sabres, how about last night’s win over the Bruins? Much has been written about the Ovechkin trick, the Backstrom feeds, the looming non-issue of Cristobal Huet’s minor, non-season-threatening tight back muscles, and the overall hilarious ineptitude of Boston. What has received no press is the hauntingly prescient comment by the aforementioned Bobtimist Prime to me around 4:45 PM yesterday afternoon. Concluding our discussion of what was clearly an upcoming victory for the Caps, Bob said, “Caps, 6-0”. A wonderful prediction, I casually thought. He repeated it again on my way out the door a half hour later. Two and a half hours past that, I watched in awe as the first period ended Caps 6 Bruins 0. Karmatic prophetic ESP ‘tism (wouldn’t be the first time)? Or something? I think we all know the answer to that.
Other wonderful nuggets from last night: Donald Brashear goading Zdeno Chara into a five-minute rest in the penalty box, freeing Ovechkin from the grasp of the great beast, possibly qualifying as the true turning point of the game. From that point onward, what was possibly a one-or-two goal game turned into nothing more than a two-hour debate on how quickly the Caps could reach double digits in goals. Dave Steckel diving to block a shot with a seven-goal lead. Alex reclaiming, again, the scoring lead, and further staking his claim to the Maurice Richard trophy. Can the Hart be far behind?
Monday, February 18, 2008
A Team Holding Steady, and an MVP Reconsidered
After a long weekend away Up North, including a return trip that featured a series of wrong/missed turns in northern New Jersey and southeastern Pennsylvania (curses forever on Allentown), I’m pleased to return home to find the Capitals holding steady. There they sit, still in a second-place tie with Atlanta and only two points behind destined-for-not-first-place Carolina. One game in hand over the former and now back to two in hand over the latter. Holding steady. Good stuff.
Also holding steady: Alex Ovechkin as the league’s leading scorer, still a full solid point ahead of New Savior of Hockey Evgeni Malkin, despite apparently playing the last two games with the flu.
Brief aside on Malkin: It’s hard to poo-poo his recent hot streak of 25 points in 13 games, but it’s not hard to suggest we should all give real consideration to revoking Sidney Crosby’s MVP award from last season. An assumed premise of awarding the Hart trophy is that the MVP makes his teammates better. It’s astoundingly clear given Malkin’s sans-Sid performances the last several weeks that Crosby’s presence and media-imposed “shadow” did nothing but severely impede the development of Malkin. Yes, Malkin won the Calder last season, but was that nothing more than the hockey media’s way of repenting to their deity Crosby for not granting him his birthright of the same award the previous season? Did they do this even perhaps knowing that their MVP god was holding back his supposed prodigy? Is this ranting perhaps being propelled by the delirium resulting from a rather frantic and stressful seven and a half hour drive down the East Coast? Probably. Nevertheless, the Canadian media should immediately begin penning articles to the effect that Evgeni Malkin should be signed by the Maple Leafs or Canadiens, because his talent clearly deserves a greater stage than will be provided in Pittsburgh once Sidney retunrs. End of no-longer-brief aside.
So where were we? Oh yes, Caps still very nearly on top, Ovechkin still on top. Even the seventh or eighth seed Plan B looks good, with scant points between the Capitals and those positions should this Southeast Division title miraculously not prove as imminent as we believe it to be.
Two final positive items of note: it seems that secondary scoring we’ve been hearing is so necessary picked it up a bit while Alex was bravely fighting through his flu bug. Newly extended Tomas Fleishmann picked up a couple goals, and Alex S. took a break from hooking and slashing to record a game-winner. All the while, Olie Kolzig continues his recent run of success. I’m truly sad to have missed his reportedly masterful mastering of the Lightning. Look: the GAA is now below 3 (2.99)! And look out Johan Holmqvist and Ray Emery: you’re about to be vaulted in terms of save percentage. Like the Caps as a whole, Kolzig is on the rise late in the season after a rough start. We see that save percentage settling nicely in the respectable area of .900, just as we see the team settling in the most respectable area of #3 seed.
Also holding steady: Alex Ovechkin as the league’s leading scorer, still a full solid point ahead of New Savior of Hockey Evgeni Malkin, despite apparently playing the last two games with the flu.
Brief aside on Malkin: It’s hard to poo-poo his recent hot streak of 25 points in 13 games, but it’s not hard to suggest we should all give real consideration to revoking Sidney Crosby’s MVP award from last season. An assumed premise of awarding the Hart trophy is that the MVP makes his teammates better. It’s astoundingly clear given Malkin’s sans-Sid performances the last several weeks that Crosby’s presence and media-imposed “shadow” did nothing but severely impede the development of Malkin. Yes, Malkin won the Calder last season, but was that nothing more than the hockey media’s way of repenting to their deity Crosby for not granting him his birthright of the same award the previous season? Did they do this even perhaps knowing that their MVP god was holding back his supposed prodigy? Is this ranting perhaps being propelled by the delirium resulting from a rather frantic and stressful seven and a half hour drive down the East Coast? Probably. Nevertheless, the Canadian media should immediately begin penning articles to the effect that Evgeni Malkin should be signed by the Maple Leafs or Canadiens, because his talent clearly deserves a greater stage than will be provided in Pittsburgh once Sidney retunrs. End of no-longer-brief aside.
So where were we? Oh yes, Caps still very nearly on top, Ovechkin still on top. Even the seventh or eighth seed Plan B looks good, with scant points between the Capitals and those positions should this Southeast Division title miraculously not prove as imminent as we believe it to be.
Two final positive items of note: it seems that secondary scoring we’ve been hearing is so necessary picked it up a bit while Alex was bravely fighting through his flu bug. Newly extended Tomas Fleishmann picked up a couple goals, and Alex S. took a break from hooking and slashing to record a game-winner. All the while, Olie Kolzig continues his recent run of success. I’m truly sad to have missed his reportedly masterful mastering of the Lightning. Look: the GAA is now below 3 (2.99)! And look out Johan Holmqvist and Ray Emery: you’re about to be vaulted in terms of save percentage. Like the Caps as a whole, Kolzig is on the rise late in the season after a rough start. We see that save percentage settling nicely in the respectable area of .900, just as we see the team settling in the most respectable area of #3 seed.
Monday, January 28, 2008
A Lesson From Philly (of all places)
In the past few weeks, DCO has joined with the rest of the known universe in endorsing Gregg Williams as the next Redskins’ head coach, going so far as to predict seven Super Bowl titles in the next thirteen years (to coincide with the Alex Ovechkin contract extension) for the Assistant Head Coach-Defense. Of course, as we learned this weekend, that prediction has no chance of happening now (unlike everything else in the DCO Crystal Ball projections that have excellent chances of happening). So much for overwhelming public opinion. It looks like positive fan vibes for Williams couldn’t get him hired in the way negative vibes for Jim Fassel may have prevented the former Ravens’ offensive dynamo assistant coach from being hired.
Here is possibly the most un-optimistic thing written on the DCO pages since its glorious inception ten months ago: that totally sucks. However the heir-apparent to persona-non-grata devolution went down, it doesn’t seem to have happened well, chummy public statements notwithstanding. Speculation is probably pointless, and we’ll probably never know what really happened in those dozens of hours of interviews betwixt Williams and Danny Snyder.
Still, even though this often-criticized (sometimes rightfully) ownership can try the optimism of even the most ‘tism-centric fan, we can’t turn a completely negative eye towards the proceedings, potentially continuity-shattering hires aside.
Whatever happens, let’s not be Philadelphia Eagles fans. More specifically, let’s not be Eagles fans a la the drafting of Donovan McNabb. Let’s not jump to immediately booing/negatively posting about the non-Gregg-Williams coaching selection in the way derelict Philly “faithful” jumped to immediately (vigorously) booing McNabb, the non-Ricky-Williams Eagles draft selection. Of course, those famously lifelong-loyal and loaded-with-talent-evaluating acumen fans looked quite the fools as McNabb garnered MVP votes and Pro Bowl appearances while leading the Eagles to division titles and a Super Bowl (the Philly championship drought continues unabated, however) while Ricky Williams underachieved, got injured and smoked pot. (There's probably a Houston vs. Mario Williams and Reggie Bush lesson in here as well, but we don't dislike Houston as much as Philadelphia, so let's leave it at that.)
So let’s not knee-jerkingly vilify whoever our non-Williams turns out to be, because we don’t want to look as dumb as Eagles fans when this mystery gentleman starts pulling in accolades and titles.
Here is possibly the most un-optimistic thing written on the DCO pages since its glorious inception ten months ago: that totally sucks. However the heir-apparent to persona-non-grata devolution went down, it doesn’t seem to have happened well, chummy public statements notwithstanding. Speculation is probably pointless, and we’ll probably never know what really happened in those dozens of hours of interviews betwixt Williams and Danny Snyder.
Still, even though this often-criticized (sometimes rightfully) ownership can try the optimism of even the most ‘tism-centric fan, we can’t turn a completely negative eye towards the proceedings, potentially continuity-shattering hires aside.
Whatever happens, let’s not be Philadelphia Eagles fans. More specifically, let’s not be Eagles fans a la the drafting of Donovan McNabb. Let’s not jump to immediately booing/negatively posting about the non-Gregg-Williams coaching selection in the way derelict Philly “faithful” jumped to immediately (vigorously) booing McNabb, the non-Ricky-Williams Eagles draft selection. Of course, those famously lifelong-loyal and loaded-with-talent-evaluating acumen fans looked quite the fools as McNabb garnered MVP votes and Pro Bowl appearances while leading the Eagles to division titles and a Super Bowl (the Philly championship drought continues unabated, however) while Ricky Williams underachieved, got injured and smoked pot. (There's probably a Houston vs. Mario Williams and Reggie Bush lesson in here as well, but we don't dislike Houston as much as Philadelphia, so let's leave it at that.)
So let’s not knee-jerkingly vilify whoever our non-Williams turns out to be, because we don’t want to look as dumb as Eagles fans when this mystery gentleman starts pulling in accolades and titles.
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
The Best Just Can't Win (or Steal Our Stars)
It was just a few days ago that we were marveling at the Capitals accounting for a full 22.2% of the Ottawa Senators’ losses this season. It was a magnificent number, a beautifully and coldly objective summation of the dominance of the East’s “worst” over the East’s “best.” The 8-6 win in Ottawa lifted the Caps out of the East’s cellar, and they found themselves at the charter members of Teams Who Have Beaten the Senators More Than Once.
How much more grand and absurd is it, then, that we see our Caps now accounting for a full 30% of the mighty Senators’ defeats. Now they stand as the lone team (probably for a while) to beat the Sens thricely (and convincingly). As in that wondrous Eastern Conference semi-final series of ten years ago, the location does not matter. Ottawa, Washington; the end result is a Caps’ victory (we can only hope to see the Senators again in the spring).
Those who were able to tear away from the end of the Mike-Emrick-hearts-Sidney-Crosby-and-finds-him-flawless game on NBC (my favorite moment: “What a move in tight quarters by Crosby”, as two Sabres skate out of the corner after relieving Sid of the puck) saw what has become a typical Capitals-Senators affair. Those same fans also saw that 2-0 deficits are completely undaunting to these rising Caps. Just like a few weeks ago against the Rangers, Bruce II’s boys shook off a shaky start and coolly worked their way back into the game and then ahead in it.
The standings aren’t so depressing to look at anymore, are they? Sure, there’s still only one team between the Caps and the bottom of the list in the East, but look at that division lead just six little points away. Look at that fourth playoff seed only eight points away. It’s a Redskins-like run towards the playoffs, though the Caps should be in position well before the last day of the regular season. Even those always-flawed ESPN power rankings found something non-snarky to say about Washington this week, even as they continue to rank them below the likes of the Edmonton Oilers.
Those still dealing in the market of snark and smarm, however, are those who feel Alex Ovechkin should bolt the Caps after this year and join a “real” hockey town. On Frozen Blog cites the New York Post and Ottawa Sun as two recent perpetrators (there are many others, mostly those calling for a move to Toronto, whose team lost a memorable 7-1 game in October, or Montreal). OFB correctly notes that such a market could not be the Canadian capital, as the Senators are apparently utterly incapable of defeating this lowly team from a lowly NHL backwater.
Seriously, all this Ovechkin-belongs-in-(insert “traditional” hockey market) is getting annoying. Aside from the fact – a fact that’s pointless to talk about or debate due to its degree of complete factualness – that Ovie is going nowhere, it’s strikingly arrogant. Who are the Don Cherrys of the world to declare which talent is fit for which club? Should our “non-traditional” markets be destined to play the Generals toCanada’s the NHL’s “elite” Globetrotters. Much has already been written/blogged on Cherry’s doubless bitterness/astonishment/nonplussed-ness at seeing the “inferior” Caps best one of his beloved “real” teams, so no need to continue on that tangent here. Suffice it to say he seems to be one of the more prominent voices calling for an Ovechkin defection to the North. I know they’d all love to see Maple Leafs vs. Oilers every year in the Cup finals, with the likes of the Panthers, Capitals, Lighting, and Hurricanes serving as defacto farm teams to develop and ship off talent. Wait a minute, those are four “non-real” hockey markets that have produced Stanley Cup finalists within the last 12 years. Maybe we shouldn’t contract their teams and plunder their best players after all.
Got off-topic there. The Caps continue their march to the playoffs, with a not-leaving-anytime-soon Alex Ovechkin. End of story.
How much more grand and absurd is it, then, that we see our Caps now accounting for a full 30% of the mighty Senators’ defeats. Now they stand as the lone team (probably for a while) to beat the Sens thricely (and convincingly). As in that wondrous Eastern Conference semi-final series of ten years ago, the location does not matter. Ottawa, Washington; the end result is a Caps’ victory (we can only hope to see the Senators again in the spring).
Those who were able to tear away from the end of the Mike-Emrick-hearts-Sidney-Crosby-and-finds-him-flawless game on NBC (my favorite moment: “What a move in tight quarters by Crosby”, as two Sabres skate out of the corner after relieving Sid of the puck) saw what has become a typical Capitals-Senators affair. Those same fans also saw that 2-0 deficits are completely undaunting to these rising Caps. Just like a few weeks ago against the Rangers, Bruce II’s boys shook off a shaky start and coolly worked their way back into the game and then ahead in it.
The standings aren’t so depressing to look at anymore, are they? Sure, there’s still only one team between the Caps and the bottom of the list in the East, but look at that division lead just six little points away. Look at that fourth playoff seed only eight points away. It’s a Redskins-like run towards the playoffs, though the Caps should be in position well before the last day of the regular season. Even those always-flawed ESPN power rankings found something non-snarky to say about Washington this week, even as they continue to rank them below the likes of the Edmonton Oilers.
Those still dealing in the market of snark and smarm, however, are those who feel Alex Ovechkin should bolt the Caps after this year and join a “real” hockey town. On Frozen Blog cites the New York Post and Ottawa Sun as two recent perpetrators (there are many others, mostly those calling for a move to Toronto, whose team lost a memorable 7-1 game in October, or Montreal). OFB correctly notes that such a market could not be the Canadian capital, as the Senators are apparently utterly incapable of defeating this lowly team from a lowly NHL backwater.
Seriously, all this Ovechkin-belongs-in-(insert “traditional” hockey market) is getting annoying. Aside from the fact – a fact that’s pointless to talk about or debate due to its degree of complete factualness – that Ovie is going nowhere, it’s strikingly arrogant. Who are the Don Cherrys of the world to declare which talent is fit for which club? Should our “non-traditional” markets be destined to play the Generals to
Got off-topic there. The Caps continue their march to the playoffs, with a not-leaving-anytime-soon Alex Ovechkin. End of story.
Sunday, December 23, 2007
King Wrong (Again)
Well, here we are: just hours away from determining the fate of the Redskins’ season. Despite what Peter King thinks, this game is utterly hugely important. It was fairly (but not entirely) shocking reading his picks earlier this week and seeing this gem regarding the Skins and Vikings nationally broadcasted game: “a game that interested only two markets at 8 PM” (he does predict that many will eventually watch a close, Adrian-Petersen-dominated game, but the snippy damage is done).
Hmm. I would think that, at the very least, lots of people in New Orleans and New York will find this game very compelling, as the result could play into their teams’ post-season future (if any). Things could get really interesting if the Bills hold off the Giants and further along New York’s Mets-like fall from contention. I’m hoping that, prior to the game, somebody gave a revenge-for-Super-Bowl-XXV speech. Buffalo fans, after all, seem to have as long and thirsty (and sometimes confusing) a memory for revenge as Ravens fans. Thus, the motivation for payback for a 17-year-old grudge could be powerful.
The game would also have been interesting to fans of the Carolina Panthers, but the former perennially popular pick to go to the Super Bowl blew it last night against the Cowboys. And speaking of the Cowboys, King, as usual, found great interest in all things Dallas, mentioning “the most famous thumb in recent football history” as the primary item of focus in that game. Apparently Tony Romo’s boo-boo makes for more gripping (get it?) football than a team trying to play on and make the playoffs not even a month after the murder of one of their own. Seems the swooning over Romo blinds one to all else (and we already know how much in love King is with the doofy Dallas QB).
It’s getting more and more disgusting seeing Romo’s continuing transformation into the critics’ Arthur Fortune, the trendily popular billionaire who (temporarily) captured the hearts of the slavishly suggestible citizens of Springfield.
So, ignoring King and the rest of the Tony-fawners, let’s look forward to this destined-to-be-successful trip to Minnesota. The game is important to many for many reasons, even if he doesn’t think so.
UPDATE 11:40 PM: Give King credit, he came within one point of correctly picking the Vikings' final score. Adrian Peterson didn't quite "run wild" per his prediction, however (9 rushes, 27 yards).
Hmm. I would think that, at the very least, lots of people in New Orleans and New York will find this game very compelling, as the result could play into their teams’ post-season future (if any). Things could get really interesting if the Bills hold off the Giants and further along New York’s Mets-like fall from contention. I’m hoping that, prior to the game, somebody gave a revenge-for-Super-Bowl-XXV speech. Buffalo fans, after all, seem to have as long and thirsty (and sometimes confusing) a memory for revenge as Ravens fans. Thus, the motivation for payback for a 17-year-old grudge could be powerful.
The game would also have been interesting to fans of the Carolina Panthers, but the former perennially popular pick to go to the Super Bowl blew it last night against the Cowboys. And speaking of the Cowboys, King, as usual, found great interest in all things Dallas, mentioning “the most famous thumb in recent football history” as the primary item of focus in that game. Apparently Tony Romo’s boo-boo makes for more gripping (get it?) football than a team trying to play on and make the playoffs not even a month after the murder of one of their own. Seems the swooning over Romo blinds one to all else (and we already know how much in love King is with the doofy Dallas QB).
It’s getting more and more disgusting seeing Romo’s continuing transformation into the critics’ Arthur Fortune, the trendily popular billionaire who (temporarily) captured the hearts of the slavishly suggestible citizens of Springfield.
So, ignoring King and the rest of the Tony-fawners, let’s look forward to this destined-to-be-successful trip to Minnesota. The game is important to many for many reasons, even if he doesn’t think so.
UPDATE 11:40 PM: Give King credit, he came within one point of correctly picking the Vikings' final score. Adrian Peterson didn't quite "run wild" per his prediction, however (9 rushes, 27 yards).
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Smile Bowl I: Brett v. Tony
Joe Buck to Brett Favre after the Packers' victory over the Lions (now ripe to be passed by the Redskins in the NFC playoff race): "You're leading the league in smiling." Was this an off-handed statement or a direct affront to Peter-King-anointed NFL Smiling Champion Tony Romo? Depending on how Romo responds in the 4:15 game, this could set up a Smiling Showdown next week when the Cowboys take on the Packers. Will it also set up a confrontation between Buck and King as to who can fawn over their respective favorite QB more? The drama.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Safety First (Place) Always
Last night, the revamped, revised, retooled Redskins checked off their second consecutive win of the season knocking off the zero-time super bowl champion Philadelphia Eagles in their decrepit backyard. So many wonderful things occurred during this nationally televised football event, mostly involving blunders both of the pregame prediction variety, and of the coaching variety, but the most wonderful thing, yes, even more wonderful than glorious ESPN.com headlines like this, was the redemption of the front office's decision-making earlier this year. On draft day, many a sports pundit heaped hatred onto the braintrust for their selection of Laron Landry with the sixth overall pick in the NFL draft. They opined, "The moment Washington filled its glaring holes on the defensive line with a safety, the priority became a party 30 miles away." How sweet it was that Landry, that nonfactor wasted draft pick, arrived at the precisely correct moment to dislodge a potential first down catch from Kevin Curtis on fourth down on one of the few Donovan McNabb passes that didn't bounce off the turf.
'Tism-hatred for the Redskins draft was marked with bizarrely incongruent thoughts of Landry clashing with the other superstar safety in the skins' lineup, Sean Taylor, culminating in Taylor missing a few initial pre-training camp workouts. Cut-and-runners decried the two sharing a backfield when their contracts were not of equal standing, assuming with a certain degree of prejudice that Taylor would never warm up to a kid making more money than him. All of these supposed red flags soon fluttered to the ground like an Jon Gruden inconclusive challenge flag thrown during a playoff loss ("I am a fan of instant replay"), and the two safeties started a noticably burgeoning relationship.
Landry broke into the starting lineup, a place never meant for green rookies. He lit up the preseason, hurdling into Kerry Collins' ribs as if he were a Jaeger Bomb in a tilt in Tennessee. He rifled through the Dolphins line to stuff Ronnie Brown to the tune of 33 yards on week one. And in front of a cable TV audience and thousands of whiney, depressed, pathetic, unwashed Philadelphians, Landry forced the knife into the Eagles.
And it isn't just the occasional clutch big play from this fantastic Redskins secondary. Everytime a receiver managed to catch one of McNabb's passes before it hit the dirt, they were met by a defender. See Reggie Brown here, being introduced to Sean Taylor's shoulder pad on a potential catch; notice (unless you are Gene Upshaw) how his lifespan has been altered. As a result of plays like this, Iggles' receivers were non-factors. In fact, as the increasingly senile Sam Huff and Sonny Jurgenson continued to point out during their slightly excruciating play-by-play last night, Redskins Defensive Associate CFO Whatever title Gregg Williams was simply dropping his two awesome safeties way way way into the secondary, just daring McNabb to bounce a throw their way. The bend-don't-break D kept the Eagles completely endzone free, leaving the lame spellings of their team name to be chanted obnoxiously only after David Akers field goals.The Redskins defense has only allowed one touchdown so far this year, and that one was an insult to which newly-minted head-slapper London Fletcher provided pertinent ether for the locker roomers, post hoc. We noted earlier that the 5-11 defense that brought so much pain to us last year was a statistical abberation. We seem to be correct there. Interesting how, unlike the entire ESPN.com sportsnation poll last night, we seem to be correct about something else as well.
Thursday, June 21, 2007
Speculation Not Pointless After All
Well, I guess we should have waited an hour or so before calling speculation over the new Capitals' uniform "pointless" in our last post. It turns out those Internet rumors were presenting the real deal after all. So much for the Big Surprise tomorrow at the Kettler Capitals Ice Complex.
Our opinion of the new look can perhaps be best summed up in the initial reaction of a DCO member a couple of days ago, when first viewing the "leaked" jersey: we don't hate it. Despite the views of numerous negative commentators on Capitals Insider, we actually think it's a pretty good look. Yes, it goes back to the old days, but is that necessarily so bad, so bad that so many people have to write something as clever as "excuse me while I vomit" when writing about the uniform? While it may be natural to initially have a negative reaction to such a drastic change, to not even give the new look a chance to, as cliched as it sounds, grow on you, is a bit much. It's grown on us the past few days and, judging by comments on sites where less-self-flagellating fans hang out, it's growing on others (sure, plenty of others dislike it, too, but what do you expect?).
Another take on this situation might be to ask the question: why must somebody always seek out to ruin a little surprise such as this one? While part of us may applaud or admire the enterprising "fan" who cracked in to the Caps web site to find this little unrevealed gem (or hunk of crap, whatever your preference may be), we must ask: why? Is it too much to wait a couple of extra days to end the suspense in proper press-conference-revealed fashion? Part of the blame is of course with whoever made the design so hacker-vulnerable in the first place, but it would be nice to not have to worry about such things.
Regardless, the new look is out now, so all us Caps fans have to ask: is it so terrible that we must change our loyalties? Should we just be thankful that our team is not the mustard-garbed Nashville Predators or the truly horrendously dressed Florida Panthers? Or should we withhold vitriol (and perhaps even gushing praise) until this one settles in, and maybe until we see it in action? Whatever the case is, don't jump on the team just because your initial reaction to the new logo isn't positive, and at the very least hope for big things on draft day tomorrow, and in the all-important free agency period to come.
Optimism in Waiting?
Well, according to Capitals Insider, the Caps are fielding calls from multiple teams regarding the #5 pick in tomorrow's draft. What might the offers be? An elite defenseman, a scoring/set-up center, a talented left wing? It's probable that, as in the situation regarding leaked uniforms, speculation is pointless, but it's also probable that the time is nigh for rampant 'Tism.
Is George McPhee ready to pull the trigger with a package to bring to Washington a missing piece such as Joni Pitkanen, as one commentator suggested (a -25 for the Flyers last year, but we'll look past that to his +37 total for the two years previous)? Regardless, this could be a sign that the Caps are ready to deal in the pre-free agent period for somebody who can make the proverbial "contribution now" and make this team decisively better in '07-'08. Perhaps. Again, like the uniforms, we shall see.
Is George McPhee ready to pull the trigger with a package to bring to Washington a missing piece such as Joni Pitkanen, as one commentator suggested (a -25 for the Flyers last year, but we'll look past that to his +37 total for the two years previous)? Regardless, this could be a sign that the Caps are ready to deal in the pre-free agent period for somebody who can make the proverbial "contribution now" and make this team decisively better in '07-'08. Perhaps. Again, like the uniforms, we shall see.
Monday, June 18, 2007
The Third-Most Irrelevant Sports Story in DC
We've already dealt with the G. Arenas non-issue non-story. If a list of Stories Irrelevant to DC Sports existed, this one would be at the top. It would be followed in irrelevance by the story of a baseball manager in another city being fired. Why this story garnered a headline on the front web page of what is purportedly a DC paper is a discussion for another time but, regardless, it is of no relevance to us. Unless of course we are counting the number of MLB managers within 50 miles who do not have "interim" in front of their title. The result of that count currently stands at 1.
A relative newcomer to this irrelevant list, coming in at #3, would be the LaRon Landry Paintball Scandal. While most local media, to their credit, have not blown this story out of the tiny proportion it should occupy, we have noticed a little more concern than is warranted in some individual fans. To them, we can only say: Relax. Everything's going to be fine. Even Coach Joe, never one to shy away from prophecies of doom when he feels it necessary (though he does at times overwhelm us with good sugary 'tism; he's a complicated man), has labeled this a "freak accident" of little note. LaRon is young. He'll heal fast and be anchoring the secondary before you know it. Besides, it's not like this story is driven by something like a contract dispute or potential felonies. It's an innocent non-bump in the road to the season opener. But in an offseason full of great moves and no arrests, there is clearly the need in some quarters to worry about something. Don't buy into it.
Etan Thomas Responds to Tom Knott (again)
We here at the DC Optimist haven't bothered wasting time covering the non-issue involving Gilbert Arenas and his financial desires. The non-point, non-issue became further moot after Gilbert eased all Washingtonians' fears as well as delighted all of the internets once again with a fanciful blog post that addressed his contract situation along with other important concerns like riding a bike without a helmet, Larry Hughes's undergarmets and video game championships. Of course that didn't stop frequent 'tism-hater Tom Knott from wagging his fingers all over his laptop in a column bashing the Agent's contract decisions. Thankfully, the bloggers have responded and Knott was once again left to look Sally Jenkins-esque in his foolhardiness. But we thought another voice was needed to K.O. Knott. In a "war" of printed words last year, Wizards center Etan Thomas got into "debate mode" over his dual role as both a mediocre center and a thoughtful public speaker with the gruff Moonie-paper columnist. Thomas came out the victor of this brief beef, and unlike many of his games, he was consistent with his points. We sought out Etan for his thoughts on the recent bashing of his teammate by the MC Eiht to his DJ Quik. His response is below:
The other day I was driving my hybrid through the dilapidated streets of Washington DC, searching for a place to park so that I could enjoy a serving of fresh falafel, free of slaughtered animals, when I encountered a copy of your "great republican" newspaper, serving as a bed-sheet to a homeless transient. Ironic, I thought, that it is Knott's blowhardiness serving to warm this disenfranchised soul. After offering my 20-oz jug of wheat grass juice to the man in exchange for his bedspread (he took 20 dollars instead), I read over your latest bashing of African Americans living in this country. How long will we have to live with your racism, Mr. Knott? My teammate Gilbert Arenas may not have the wherewithal to deliver me the rock when I am free on the low block, but he is true with his intentions as a business person in America. What is wrong with a brother looking to maximize his financial means?
I was once a hungry rookie on the Washington bench, fiending for the opportunity to show off my potential to the Wizards' management, and after my impressive 03-04, I was rewarded with a contract that is critical to the team's success. I knew that with my financial future on the line, I would play as if my dreads were posessed by Jah himself, and afterwards, I would reap the rewards. I only see the play of Gilbert as going in the same direction, granted he passes me the ball every four or five posessions. The new contract, like the haters, will be his motivation, much like annihilating prejudice from the minds of bitter, unathletic sports columnists has always been mine.
Maybe you didn't know that while I was earning my degree from the prestigious Syracuse University, I was also serving as captain of the debate team, poet laureate and all-time shot block leader. I feel obligated to speak my mind when it comes to issues that involve racism, as most of your columns tend to do (and don't think I didn't notice your labelling of me as "The Poet" once again, as if having a literary-mindedness somehow is cause for jokes). I also have a problem with these websites that attempt to imitate my writing style in an effort to draw laughs at the expense of me and my mission. Laugh it up in your office cubicles; you are not out on the front lines speaking for the disenfranchised. Since everyone loves to affix me with this "poet" label, here's some battle rhymes I wrote for all of you:
I see you affixing your labels
eyes like post it notes
neon with hatred
none will attach
when my hands is slippery
Try to move me
but I won't budge
paper motivation like one sentence paragraphs
dramatic
but fleeting
*author may not be Etan Thomas
Sunday, June 10, 2007
A win with no decades-old grudges
In other cities, a contest against the team that abandoned you, no matter how long ago the abandonment was and no matter how over it you should be, would be cause for much city-wide chest thumping and maddened calls for "revenge". A defeat to this team, consequently, would cause city-wide despair.
In Washington, however, there was no such chest-thumping and no calls for revenge regarding the recently completed weekend series between the Nationals and the ex-Nationals/Senators (aka, Twins). Even if there were such sentiments, no despair would be necessary this Sunday night, because the Nats left Minnesota with a series win. It's even possible to imagine they could have left with a series sweep if Dmitri Young's first-inning bomb had strayed a few inches left and into fair territory. And speaking of that near-home run, was that King of 'Tism Manny Acta out on the field to (briefly) argue the call? It was good to see, and it was even better to see Man Act handle himself like a gentleman in such a situation, in contrast to...you know. So before we surrender to the consternation that is the Gilbert Arenas Situation, let's pause to enjoy a great weekend of DC baseball.
A quick stat: 34 hits in three games, led again by Young and Christian Guzman, who now see their team-leading batting averages stand at .342 and .346, respectively. The bats are back, they just need to be timed a little better to capitalize on the extra baserunners. What is needed to accomplish this is a little positive encouragement, not snippy criticisms. With the hitting improving and healthy pitching on the way, 'tism levels should be spiking about now. Having soundly left the Worst Team of All-Time talk behind them, these Nationals should head straight for .500 and not look back, landing ChairManny a Manager of the Year award in the process.
Going back to pitching for a moment, this weekend series also finally answered the question: Is Levale Speigner better than a Cy Young winner?
In all, a nice start to the gimmicky portion of the schedule. Next up, a series in the afformentioned revenge-thirsty Charm City.
In Washington, however, there was no such chest-thumping and no calls for revenge regarding the recently completed weekend series between the Nationals and the ex-Nationals/Senators (aka, Twins). Even if there were such sentiments, no despair would be necessary this Sunday night, because the Nats left Minnesota with a series win. It's even possible to imagine they could have left with a series sweep if Dmitri Young's first-inning bomb had strayed a few inches left and into fair territory. And speaking of that near-home run, was that King of 'Tism Manny Acta out on the field to (briefly) argue the call? It was good to see, and it was even better to see Man Act handle himself like a gentleman in such a situation, in contrast to...you know. So before we surrender to the consternation that is the Gilbert Arenas Situation, let's pause to enjoy a great weekend of DC baseball.
A quick stat: 34 hits in three games, led again by Young and Christian Guzman, who now see their team-leading batting averages stand at .342 and .346, respectively. The bats are back, they just need to be timed a little better to capitalize on the extra baserunners. What is needed to accomplish this is a little positive encouragement, not snippy criticisms. With the hitting improving and healthy pitching on the way, 'tism levels should be spiking about now. Having soundly left the Worst Team of All-Time talk behind them, these Nationals should head straight for .500 and not look back, landing ChairManny a Manager of the Year award in the process.
Going back to pitching for a moment, this weekend series also finally answered the question: Is Levale Speigner better than a Cy Young winner?
In all, a nice start to the gimmicky portion of the schedule. Next up, a series in the afformentioned revenge-thirsty Charm City.
Thursday, May 24, 2007
The DC Optimist would like to apologize...
We here at the DC Optimist would like to apologize for our comments a couple of days ago regarding the defense of Clinton Portis, who has quickly turned into the Rant Casey of NFL writer and fan finger-wagging, spreading a penchant for soapbox-standing as if it were rabies. Simply associating yourself with this one-time media darling leads to an innumerable amount of pooh-poohing blog posts. To characterize these genuinely altruistic whistle-blowhards as racists goes a little too far. I mean, being that most of them likely grew up near the mean streets of places like Potomac where dog fights likely involved Ace Combat 7 for PS3, they know only of Benji, not of "Dog."
We just want to reiterate that The DC Optimist in no way condones dog fighting. In fact, all of us are dog lovers. Never would we go as far as thanking the vicious brutality that was allegedly performed by Michael Vick and defended by the misunderstood Redskins running back. Thanking this indefensible act simply for bringing to light its existence is similar to thanking the drafting of Kwame Brown and the trading of Rip Hamilton for bringing to light the mismanagement of Michael Jordan; the damage has already been done.
We don't wan't to be associated with Portis's anti-animal stances, we are pro-animals, especially of Hershey Bears, again heading for the Calder Cup with the Capitals' extra-bright future in tow. Of course some hater-types, who enjoy animal fighting, attempted to thwart the greatness of the Bears by actually reaching into the penalty box to attack Kip Brennan. "If that's what he wants to do, do it."
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